Stalking
Stalking is a course of conduct directed at a specific person that would cause a reasonable person to feel fear. It includes both an element of intimidation and an element of control. It does this by destroying the survivor's privacy and security. There is an association between stalking and higher lethality. Stalking occurs both before and after separation. Examples of stalking are:
- frequent phone calls and texts
- being upset if calls and texts aren't returned very quickly
- insisting that the survivor call or text to check in frequently
- questioning about all activities
- insisting on knowing all people the survivor has contact with
- not allowing partner to keep conversations private
- not allowing partner any private or alone time, opening partner’s mail, checking their phone log or directory
- canceling appointments for the survivor (in contrast to never making appointments for the survivor)
- going through the survivor's purse or dresser
- asking others to keep an eye on the survivor
- questioning others to reconstruct partner’s movements
- following partner, not allowing partner to go alone to an activity only they are interested in
- not allowing a partner to go somewhere the primary aggressor doesn’t want to go
- showing up unannounced or uninvited,
- showing up very late or very early,
- showing up at a workplace,
- placing private information or rumors on the internet
- placing private photos on the internet
- forwarding private communications by electronic means
- 'spoofing' contact from the survivor to third parties
In many cases, primary aggressors have installed video surveillance, recording devices, or computer programs that track computer use.